You Are Not Your Own | Ryan Romeo

Sadly, I’ve met many people who believe that God’s call is to deny their dreams and passions. To take the deep-down dream in their heart and sacrifice it on the altar. And when they use that kind of spiritual language, it seems right. It seems noble. It seems Jesus-y. But I think the truth is that this is a perspective rooted more in fear than faith. It may sound right, but it won’t produce much fruit in a person’s life. It’s only another misguided whisper from the Everything-Should-Be-Easy Optimist.

Now, don’t get me wrong, following Jesus does have a price. A big one. And it will no doubt require great sacrifice and patience from you. God will also reveal selfish and self-exalting aspects of your dream that must be burned away. Sometimes painfully. But the notion that God wants you to sacrifice your entire dream does not line up with what I know about the character of the Dream Giver.

So why does this misguided mindset persist? Why do so many of us seem to think denying the dreams God gives us is somehow pleasing to God?

I think it stems in part from a misunderstanding of what Jesus meant when he said, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me” (Matthew 16:24). We also know that Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33). These are not fun to hear. This is not the picture of a happy-go-lucky life with Jesus fulfilling our dreams. So I get it. I understand how some people might come to the conclusion that we need to deny ourselves anything in this life that brings any joy or fulfillment.

But . . .

Dying to yourself does not mean dying to the God-wired, God-purposed portion of your life. I need you to hear this: when you give your life to Jesus, you do not lose the unique and beautiful things God created inside you. You amplify them. The crazy truth is that when you lose your life for Jesus, you gain it back with interest. You gain the true you back. Dying to yourself does not mean dying to the God-given dreams in your life. It does not mean sacrificing the skills and talents and uniqueness of the person he created you to be.

So what does it mean to deny ourselves? It means to follow Christ in his mission of sacrificial love. It means to set aside anything that keeps us from saying an empowered yes to the person we were created to be and to become. And what does that look like when we’re chasing a big dream? It might mean sacrificing a desire to be famous so we can say yes to God using us behind the scenes. It might mean sacrificing a desire to be comfortable and unchallenged so we can say yes to God’s teaching us perseverance and wisdom. It might mean sacrificing finances or free time so we can say yes to the God-dream. Do you see how these require a death to self but also a life-affirming yes to God?

Make no mistake, pursuing your dreams will likely be one of the hardest pursuits of your life. It will be a crucible of character that burns away whatever it is that isn’t part of the true you. Those are the things—and there may be many—that God wants you to sacrifice. Each one will require humility. Each one will require a death—a dying to self-will—that will hurt. And each one will ultimately help you say a deeper yes to God and the dreams he has for you.

But none will require the sacrifice of your calling. Your calling is not your own. It is a dream that originates in God, not you. Remember, you are the steward, not the owner, of your dream. This is the same principle the apostle Paul used when he wrote, “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6:19–20).

Now, I understand the context of this verse is not talking about your dreams. But the principle is the same—you are not your own. You were bought at a great price. You belong to someone else. And that Someone Else has invested dreams, talents, and attributes in you that he wants you to run with. He held a dream in his hands, lined up everyone on earth, and then pointed right to you and said, “I entrust this dream to you.” He wants you to love this dream and to live it, not sacrifice it.


Taken from Head in the Clouds, Feet on the Ground  by Ryan Romeo. Copyright © 2020 by Ryan Romeo. Used by permission of Zondervan. www.zondervan.com. 

Ryan Romeo is the Creative Director and Co-Founder of the Outcry worship tour and author Head in the Clouds, Feet on the Ground (Zondervan). In the first three years, the Outcry tour traveled to over 86 cities, and has reached nearly a million people. He is currently the Pastor of Creative Arts at Living Streams Church in Phoenix, AZ, where he lives with his wife, Blake, and their three children.

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